As I’ve noted many times, I am a console gamer. That means no PC, no phone and no tablet games. As such, I was very much looking forward to the fourth and final week of Xbox Live’s Arcade Next, which signaled the arrival of Minecraft on the Xbox 360. I had a general idea of what the game was all about, but I was surprised at just how easily I was sucked into its blocky world.

CONTROLS (4/5)

When PC games that rely on point-and-click mouse controls are ported over to controllers, the worry is that too much precision will be lost and you’ll end up with a clunky setup. By and large, Minecraft avoids this fate. Navigating and mining feel natural on the controller, leaving only a sometimes aggravating inventory system to deal with. Crafting items are separated and can be tabbed through quickly, but the overall inventory interface is somewhat shaky.

GRAPHICS/SOUND (3.5/5)

From a technical aspect, Minecraft is comically outdated. Of course, those blocky pixilated visuals have become iconic among gamers so any change would have been rejected. That’s because, despite their simplicity, the visuals pack an undeniable charm. The world is massive and feels somehow alive even with its clear disconnect from reality. There are probably a certain percentage of gamers that won’t be able to get past it, but that’s to their detriment.

The soundtrack is generally calm and serene; at first I didn’t think I’d like it. It grew on me, though, and fits perfectly with the generally leisurely pace of the game. Sound effects are good with all the basic animal noises covered and even a surprisingly creepy zombie moan.

GAMEPLAY (4/5)

In some ways it’s hard to describe Minecraft in regard to its purpose as a video game to someone that was entirely unfamiliar with the concept. There is no story, no characters, no dialogue, no bad guy and no definitive motive for playing. You are plopped into a vast world armed only with a map and your bare hands and told, “OK, create something.” And therein lays either the title’s greatest strength or most glaring weakness, depending on what you’re looking for from a video game.

If you’re someone that really values freedom and creativity for their gaming dollar, it’s tough to get much better than this. As long as you’re willing to put in the time, there is little you cannot do. Essentially, the game breaks down into you mining cubes of various materials, which are then used and combined to construct new objects — many of which can then be merged further to create more complex and valuable items.

Early on you’ll likely be working hard to get a small homestead going, which means busting down trees for wood and then processing the wood into planks for construction. Amazingly, every item you find in Minecraft seems to have one or more uses so there can be a lot to digest. One nice time-saving feature is that if you push the left bumper while viewing something, an in-game tutorial pops up and gives you a breakdown of that item and what can be done with it. For example, cows can be hit until they turn into leather… or, if you have a bucket, they can be milked.

Not everything in Minecraft is friendly, however, and when day turns to night, all sorts of unsavory things show up to come after you. Zombies, spiders, the infamous creepers and more will attack you with a relentless fervour if you choose to stay out after dark. You are able to build weapons and armour to defend yourself, but for most the preferred course will be to sleep the nights away. That’s because if all of your hearts are depleted you’ll be sent back to the last bed you slept in, and all the items you were carrying will remain where you were killed. If you’re close to home it’s not an issue, though if you’d become lost or had traveled far it can be frustrating to lose your stuff.

However, while the game offers a ton of things to do, it never directs you to do a single one of them. You are truly on your own outside of an admittedly solid tutorial mode, and if you lack the initiative to build the proverbial “better mousetrap” this won’t be for you. It takes a significant time investment to truly immerse yourself and start shaping your randomly generate cube world into something unique. If that doesn’t sound like you then your money is better spent elsewhere.

For those that are interested in taking the plunge, Minecraft also offers up multiplayer action locally as well as through Xbox Live. This is a surprisingly cool feature and one that is slickly handled with the ability to join or invite being very simple. It’s also another way to enjoy the game if you feel like mixing it up and traveling to another player’s world or bringing them into yours.

OVERALL (4/5)

If I may dip back into my book of axioms, Minecraft is the epitome of a game where you get out of it what you put into it. So if you’ve got the imagination and resolve to put in the hours necessary to do something special, this could be the best 1,600 MS Points (US$20) you spend all year.

Boston’s awful start this year has plenty of culprits behind it, including a sluggish start by first baseman Adrian Gonzalez – especially in the power department.

Well, after dropping the opener against Cleveland on Thursday, the BoSox won each of the final three games.

A-Gon figured prominently in the series, recording multiple hits in three of the four games and flashing some extra-base pop, with five doubles among his six hits.

After career highs in runs and hits last year, Gonzalez still has a long way to go to get back on track, but this weekend’s performance was a step in the right direction for both him and the team.

The big question is where has Gonzalez’s home run stroke gone? Last year, the shoulder he had repaired in 2010 continued to bother him, but he says that’s fully behind him now. In other words, there’s no reasonable reason why Gonzalez isn’t going yard lately. Let’s hope the doubles barrage is a precursor to some long ball exploits.

Quick Hits

• Kevin Millwood, who somewhat revitalized his career in Colorado last year yet was overlooked as an option for the Rockies’ rotation this winter, had only looked useful in two of his first six starts this season for the Mariners. On Sunday, however, he wound up tossing a pretty good outing to earn his first win of the season and spoil the return of Andy Pettitte. The wildness – he’s walked nine batters over his past two starts – makes Millwood a tough pitcher to recommend as anything more than a spot starter in deep AL-only leagues. On Sunday, it’s highly doubtful he would have stuck around as long as he did without the aid of three double plays. And while it was nice to see the 37-year-old go over the 2,000-strikeout mark in his career, it’s clear he’s just keeping a seat warm for one of Seattle’s big pitching prospects (such as James Paxton or Danny Hultzen).
• The Mets had a ninth-inning meltdown Sunday, giving up six runs to the Marlins en route to a crushing 8-4 loss. The late uprising by the Fish was highlighted by a Giancarlo Stanton grand salami, part of a three-hit game – his third straight multi-hit effort. Stanton is now batting .289, but given his strikeout rate (which, while improved, is still quite high), it’s highly doubtful he maintains this BA. By the way, those of you that were worried about his lack of pop in April (one homer, nine RBI) can relax. Stanton is up to six dingers and 13 RBI in May – with two and a half weeks still to go!
• Need a little help in the stolen base department in your deep AL-only league? How about Elliot Johnson of the Rays? He’s playing more with Evan Longoria out and has actually been somewhat useful at the plate lately, hitting safely in five straight games including a 3-for-4 effort Sunday with three runs, a homer, two RBI and a steal. The switch-hitter can’t be counted on for much offense, but he’s got some speed and seems to be making decent contact lately, so there are probably worse options on the wire. At the very least, put him on your watch list.

RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast

Crave more in-depth Fantasy analysis? Then join us every Thursday at 9 p.m. EST for RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast on Blogtalkradio. Tim, Buck and I will entertain and edify you for an hour or more each week. Tune in here.

Tim is off at a wedding this week (no, not his own – he’s already married and he lives in Northern Ontario not Northern Utah), so the Troll once again falls into the shaky hands of your non-so-trusty Editor. On to our picks of the week…

Andy Dirks, OF, Detroit Tigers: Heading into the season, Dirks sat at the very bottom (145th) of our Fantasy outfielder rankings. Clearly, we’re not the only ones to be shocked to see him playing at a top 50 level, but that’s where he’s been, as this dude has found a home in the two-hole of the Tigers’ lineup. Dirks has been among the week’s most popular waiver wire picks, yet he’s still available in most leagues, so there’s time to jump on his train. He’s hit safely in seven straight games, including multi-hit efforts in the first five. Hell, Dirks has even started to draw walks, picking up his first four free passes of the season all in the last five games. He’s flashing extra-base pop, fine strike zone judgment and is hitting for an obscene .379 BA through his first 20 games. Note that Dirks is dealing with a hammy issue right now, but he’s playing through it. If you lost Jayson Werth to the DL last week, this is one of the best replacement options you’ll find.

Dale Thayer, RP, San Diego Padres: Huston Street has landed on the DL (no surprise) and Andrew Cashner has failed to fill the void (surprise), so suddenly it’s Thayer – who was last on our radar three years ago — who is earning saves in San Diego. This veteran has spent most of his time at Triple-A over the past half dozen years, but he does have a good track record as a minor league closer. After stranding a runner at third Saturday, the bushy-’stached Thayer is now 3-for-3 in save chances and flying off the wire. Grab him immediately.
 
Hank Conger, C, Los Angeles Angels: Conger, who graduated from our Top 50 Prospects in 2011, began this season on fire, but wound up on the DL at Triple-A a couple of weeks ago with a sprained elbow. It sucks that he’s hurting now, because Conger surely would have gotten another shot for the Angels with Chris Iannetta out for the next couple of months. But before getting injured, Conger was flashing serious extra-base pop and tremendous on-base skills – two things the Halos could use right about now – so once he’s healed (likely before the end of the month), expect to see him get a long look in Anaheim. If you can stash him, it’ll pay dividends.

Vladimir Guerrero, DH, Toronto Blue Jays: As we discussed in last week’s Podcast, the Jays have signed Guerrero, and while many might think he’s got nothing left, we believe he’s worth a look. He’s down at Dunedin, working his way back into game shape, but once he arrives, Vladdy will the Jays’ DH against lefties – which will mean less PT for struggling Adam Lind. Guerrero is getting a bit long in the tooth (37), but with a .561 career slugging percentage against southpaws, he can still do some serious damage.
 
Brian Dozier, SS, Minnesota Twins: Dozier, called up by the Twins to replace pathetic excuse for a starting shortstop Jamey Carroll, is another dude we talked about in the most recent episode of RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast. We suggest you give Dozier a look in deeper AL-only leagues as he’s batting in the two-hole of Minnesota’s powerhouse lineup (okay, maybe not), and has hit safely in four of his six games so far, twice recording multiple base knocks. The prospect wasn’t exactly dominating in his first taste of Triple-A, so this is an aggressive move by the Twins, underscoring once again how foolish it was to give Carroll a multi-year deal. Don’t expect a ton of offense from this kid, but hey, the dude’s starting at a shallow position, so there is some value here.

Andy Pettitte, SP, New York Yankees: Another topic of discussion in the Podcast, Pettitte will make his season debut Sunday, and could be a sneaky play because he’s taking on the Mariners and their miserable excuse for an offense. Still, it’s hard to expect much from this aging veteran who hasn’t made a start in the bigs since mid-October 2010. But hey, at least he raises the Yankees’ average age by about five years. So much for New York’s youth movement. However, Pettitte does know how to pound the strike zone, and with the Yankee attack behind him, he should be able to scratch out some Ws, so give him a look in AL-only leagues.
 
Casey Janssen, RP, Toronto Blue Jays: Last week’s Podcast was clearly a sneak peak of this weeks’ Wire Troll as Janssen — recently named as the new Toronto closer — was also on the docket. The third Jay reliever to try to nail down games (Sergio Santos got hurt and Francisco Cordero simply sucked), Janssen is the latest hot commodity in what is turning out to be a season of turmoil among the closer ranks. On Saturday, Janssen tossed his second straight perfect outing for his second save since ascending to the role. Until Santos returns from the DL, Janssen is a must-own player.
 
Joaquin Benoit, RP, Detroit Tigers: Heading into the season, we talked about how Jose Valverde was the shakiest of the top tier closers, and how Benoit could benefit if Valverde implodes. Well, Valverde still has the gig in Motown, but he’s already blown two saves after going perfect last year, and his command has been atrocious. Benoit, meanwhile, hasn’t been much better, looking much more hittable this year and also dealing with wildness. Still, the Tigers’ eighth-inning man is rounding into form, tossing four straight shutout outings, giving up just one hit and one walk while striking out five over 3 1/3 IP during this stretch. Benoit struggled for two months last year before turning it on; it looks like he’s overcome his slow start earlier this year. This dude is widely available, and AL-only league owners should give him a long look – Benoit could be money from here on out and will provide a nice boost in Ks (22 in just 13 2/3 IP), holds, ERA and WHIP (which will get much better than its current ugly state very quickly).

RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast

Crave more in-depth Fantasy analysis? Then join us every Thursday at 9 p.m. EST for RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast on Blogtalkradio. Tim, Buck and I will entertain and edify you for an hour or more each week. Tune in here.

“Fun but flawed” would be an apt CliffsNotes review of the original Prototype, which allowed you to run amok as the powerfully mutated Alex Mercer in an open-world sandbox. Some three years later, developer Radical Entertainment has teamed up with Activision once again to release Prototype 2, a title that looks to build on the promise found in the first game.

CONTROLS (3.75/5)

Prototype 2 is a rare game in that it actually gets more difficult to control as your abilities evolve and become more powerful. Early on it’s easy to keep track of everything, but eventually you’ll have access to five separate powers (you can only have two “active” at once) and your movement speed and jumping will be so extreme it becomes unwieldy. The setup reminded of a line from the movie The Siege, where Bruce Willis says the Army is a “broad sword, not a scalpel.”

That is exactly what the controls here are like. Even when you want to be precise you move and attack at such a frenetic pace that it’s not even really an option. As noted, it’s not a big deal early on. However, as you and your enemies grow faster, the combat — and to a lesser extent navigating the city — can become a dizzying affair to keep track of.

Also serving to undercut your precision is a targeting system that often locks on enemies or objects that are well out of range from what you are currently fighting. You are able to cycle through targets, but in truth that’s only viable when facing off against small numbers of enemies. Otherwise you’re open to take a pounding. Thankfully, you are equipped to do just that so all of the control issues can be shrugged off as simple inconveniences.

GRAPHICS/SOUND (3.75/5)

There is little doubt Prototype 2 earns its “M” rating on all fronts. Visually, the game is saturated in blood with violent dismemberments aplenty as your character must consume his victims, which more often than not means pounding them into a pulp. It creates a visceral satisfaction, though by the time the credits roll you will have seen all the game has to offer repeatedly. It’s a shame that, as you level up your abilities and activate more mutations, new kill animations aren’t added.

Although the entirety of the game takes place in NYZ, a post-outbreak version of New York City, you do get some environmental variety in the form of different zones. While you’re still clambering up buildings and soaring through cityscapes, at least the infected activity level is decidedly different. The city looks pretty good, but you can see the limitations when you scale a tall building and look around as all sense of detail vanishes.

Voice acting is respectable with the principle emotion being rage. James Heller pulls out almost all the profanity stops in his role as a father turned vigilante, cursing a blue streak from start to finish. His victims don’t shy away from colourful language, either, and your foes are depicted as such remorseless caricatures, with nary a shred of human decency, that it gets to be a little much after awhile. Sound effects are forceful and the in-game music is respectable.

GAMEPLAY (4/5)

A little over a year has passed since the initial outbreak, and New York City is once again quarantined after a second appearance of the Mercer Virus. You play as James Heller, who has returned from a tour of duty in Iraq to find his wife and daughter declared dead. Despondent, Heller blames Mercer, and pursues him in an early scene. The fight ends with Mercer easily dispatching you. However, instead of killing you he injects you with the virus to grant you the same supernatural powers.

From there, the story essentially revolves around which faction — Mercer’s evolved or the Blackwatch mercenaries — represents the lesser evil. To advance the main arc, Prototype 2 utilizes the same setup as Rockstar’s open world games in which missions are triggered by going to marked points on the map. Similar to those games, the time in between story sections can be filled up by exploring the massive sandbox of an infected New York.

Whether you’re pursuing the story missions or Blackwatch side quests, the game plays out predictably with a limited variety of objectives. In fact, the majority of them revolve around you consuming enemies to infiltrate a secure facility and then laying waste to it. Yeah, they’re fun… I just wish the developers could have found more ways to mix things up. Outside of the odd crate collection, where you race the clock, it’s almost all hunt and consume.

In addition to a dozen multi-part side quests, there are also black boxes to find, lairs to destroy and field teams to eliminate. They’re all completely optional, but since completing those nets you upgrades, odds are you’ll be tackling them as soon as they become available.

Upgrades in Prototype 2 are actually split into three distinct paths. Overall upgrades — such as health, jumping/speed and regeneration – are achieved by leveling up Heller via the experience points earned from completing missions and consuming specific foes. Mutation power boosts for augmenting abilities follow the Fallout 3 “perk” system (right down to the animations) and are unlocked by finishing the aforementioned side quests. Lastly, enemies will randomly appear with a flexed arm over their heads; consume them and you’ll raise your proficiency within a specific power.

Combat pulls no punches in Prototype 2, empowering Heller early and steadily ratcheting up his powers throughout the game. However, combat is highly imprecise as you’ll often find yourself flying around areas trying to frantically maintain your bearings. It also doesn’t help the growing sense of sameness that the game shows you pretty much all it has to offer before you leave the original zone. New enemies do continue to debut, but your tactics are unlikely to change much.

All told, you can expect to spend north of a dozen hours going through the campaign, assuming you spend time exploring and completing the side quests. Once you’re finished, a new difficulty setting opens up, and you can continue with a game-plus mode, giving the more dedicated players a good reason to make a second run.

OVERALL (4/5)

Much improved over the original, Prototype 2 is pretty much an ass-kicking simulator; it puts massive amounts of destructive power at your fingertips and droves of hapless foes in your path to dispatch. There are some issues to overcome, but they don’t do enough to significantly damage my endorsement.

While RotoRob is lost in playoff anguish, Buck and Tim carry on with RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly, heard each Thursday at 9 p.m. EST on Blogtalkradio.

In this week’s episode, the boys covered a veritable cornucopia of Fantasy baseball goodness, including:

• Despite the inexplicable two-year deal they gave him, the Twins finally figured out that Jamey Carroll isn’t anybody’s idea of a real starting shortstop so they’ve brought up prospect Brian Dozier to do the job. Can he provide value for Fantasy owners at a thin position?
• The Jays’ surprising signing of Vladimir Guerrero and what this could mean for Toronto. Could Vlady take over at DH, sending Edwin Encarnacion back to first base and the struggling — and recently demoted in the lineup — Adam Lind to the bench?
• The pending arrival of Andy Pettitte and whether that is cause for any excitement among the Fantasy ranks.
• Jayson Werth, who was finally showing signs of life, will now be werth-less after a busted wrist.
• The great — and surprising — start by the St. Louis Cardinals, a team many wrote off after the loss of Albert Pujols.
• How the Rays will fare without Evan Longoria and Desmond Jennings?
• The Jays finally giving Casey Janssen a chance to close.
• Is Brad Penney a Tim McLeod sleeper now that he pitched in Japan?
• Boston’s plans for Kevin Youkilis with Will Middlebrooks establishing himself as a legitimate force.
• Billy Hamilton’s stolen base bonanza at High-A.
• Yet another rant over baseball’s stupid five-game suspensions for starting pitchers.
• Could the Phillies actually be sellers at the trade deadline this year?

Listen to the Podcast in its entirety by clicking that funky arrow thingy below.

The Toronto Blue Jays continue to play well lately, but with both the Rays and Orioles rolling, they have now fallen three back of Tampa Bay and two and a half games behind Baltimore in the AL East. On the plus side, the Yanks have been spinning their wheels, allowing Toronto to slide into third place, a half game ahead of New York.

On Monday, Brett Lawrie doubled for the second straight game, but we’re still waiting to see the youngster go on a real tear and start to live up to the lofty expectations. He’s not piling up runs the way he did as a rookie, nor is he being nearly as productive. Lawrie’s BA is down slightly, but nothing to get overly worried about, but the real item that jumps out from his line is the slugging percentage.

After putting up a whopping .580 mark in 150 at-bats last year, Lawrie is only slugging .400 this season. He’s been better with the glove than anticipated and continues to exhibit all-out hustle that makes him a joy to watch, but we’re wondering what happened to that pop he flashed last season.

Are any of you Lawrie owners worried about your boy’s pedestrian slugging through the first few weeks of the season?

Quick Hits

• Still in Toronto, struggling Adam Lind was finally demoted by Manager John Farrell on Wednesday, dropping from the clean-up slot to eighth in the Jay batting order. He immediately responded with two hits, including a two-run homer. Heading into the season, we ranked Lind as a Top 20 first baseman, but so far he hasn’t even ranked among the top 40 at the position, batting under .200 with very little extra-base pop. Ten RBI in 28 games out of a dude that has mostly batted fourth? That ain’t gunna cut it. Small wonder that Lind has been winding up on waiver wires in mixed leagues. Keep an eye on him, though. If this demotion spurs him, Lind will soon be put back into a more prominent batting spot and will again be a useful Fantasy asset.
• We’ve got to give props to Reds’ starter Johnny Cueto. Heading into the season, we expected him to be a Top 40 starting pitcher, but he’s probably been among the top five hurlers through the first month and change. When we ranked him, we talked about his low BABIP last year, anticipating regression there, but shockingly, there has been barely any slide in that department. The results – after Cueto’s seven shutout frames Wednesday to nearly match Zack Greinke – have been phenomenal, as he’s given up more than one earned run just once all season. We still find it hard to believe his BABIP won’t head north at some point, so if you’re looking for a sell-high candidate, Cueto is your man.
• Another player who has vastly outperformed our expectations in the early going is Tampa Bay outfielder Matt Joyce. We ranked Joyce as the 56th-best Fantasy outfielder heading into the season, but he has delivered at a top 20 level so far. He spanked a three-run dinger in the ninth to propel the Rays over the Yanks Wednesday (even though he hurt his ankle on the swing), part of a two-hit night – his second multi-hit effort in the past three games. Joyce is hitting for a higher average than ever before despite the fact he’s been more aggressive at the plate (his 3.95 P/PPA is a career low). The big difference for Joyce this season, however, is his work against southpaws. Last year, he hit just .217 against them; so far this season, he’s batting .250, and that’s good enough to ensure he won’t wind up as a platoon dude and will continue to enjoy full-time duty.

RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast

Crave more in-depth Fantasy analysis? Then join us every Thursday at 9 p.m. EST for RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast on Blogtalkradio. Tim, Buck and I will entertain and edify you for an hour or more each week. Tune in here.

The only problem with being a fan of role-playing games is that there just isn’t enough time to enjoy every single one of them. With many quests boasting hundreds of hours of gameplay, it’s inevitable that some series slip through the cracks. Personally, I missed out on the Disgaea series that originally started out on the PlayStation 2. Being a fan of old-school Japanese RPGs, like Chrono Trigger and the Final Fantasy series, and an avid anime viewer as well, it looked like something I could sink my teeth into, but I simply never had the chance. Until now, that is — Nippon Ichi Software has re-released its 2008 PlayStation 3 installment as Disgaea 3: Absence of Detention on Sony’s PlayStation Vita. Now I can finally see what I’ve been missing.

CONTROLS (4/5)

Continuing the series of turn-based role-playing strategy combat, Absence of Detention doesn’t deviate from the successful formula of the genre. Each battle takes place on an isometric playing field where each turn starts with placing your combatants like chess pieces. Execute a series of attacks, magic spells and item usage via menus, then the enemy team takes their turn. The cycle repeats until you drain all of the foe’s health points — resulting in fanfare, victory dances and, most importantly, loot and experience points for leveling up your party. With several classes of characters and enemies, bountiful amounts of weapons and items, and tons of skills and rules to learn, tackling this quest can be intimidating to newcomers. But like any solid RPG, the menu layout and navigation is easy to get around and there’s no shortage of tutorials to get you started.

Usage of the Vita’s touch screen and rear touch panel is also very simple as well. Tapping corners offers quick zoom, holding square while tapping changes perspective and using the bumpers will rotate the camera. All of these function well enough to get the best view of the grid even though the overall feel is loose and could use some tightening. The touch screen can also be used to position your team and select their movement, but this isn’t the most precise method of control. Fortunately, rather than force new touch controls on players just for the sake of demonstrating the portable’s capabilities, the options of Disgaea 3 allow it to handle like a traditional strategy title in every way. That’s not to say that smoother touch-control integration wouldn’t be appreciated in future updates or series installments.

GRAPHICS/SOUND (3.75/5)

Disgaea 3 is an old-school JRPG and anime fan’s paradise filled with adorable sprite-based characters performing over-the-top magic spells and stylized special attack moves. Seamlessly blending with the 3D environments, every character and creature is seeping with a classic nostalgic vibe while still looking crisp and detailed (I’d avoid the “Soft” visual setting, though, as it makes the characters look washed out and dull). Being mostly a lighthearted comical epic, expect ridiculous and goofy voice samples (in your choice of English or Japanese), hilarious text- and artwork-driven cut scenes and an equally colourful musical score.

Perhaps this title is a little too throwback to truly demonstrate the Vita’s power. Even though the visuals are hitting all the sweet spots for the target audience, there’s no getting around the fact that the general animation during basic combat is very limited and the 3D visuals lack the wow factor of other PS3 ports.

GAMEPLAY (4.5/5)

Most RPGs proudly boast a gameplay lifespan of over 100 hours. Disgaea 3 mockingly laughs at your puny 100 hours and brags of over 1 million hours of gameplay. That’s like… I don’t know… a lot of days, right? But really, there is a ton of content in this title. Not only is this a full port of the PS3 title and all its available DLC, but there are new scenarios, new characters and new skills exclusive to this new version. But what does that mean to people like me who missed out on not only this last installment, but the whole series?

It’s simple: If you enjoyed games like Final Fantasy Tactics or Ogre Battle, this is right up your ally. Heck, if you enjoyed any turn-based JRPG ever, this is about as good as it gets. And like most series, previous knowledge of past installments isn’t necessary to enjoy this one. Following the exploits of Mao, the No. 1 honour student at the Evil Academy, your initial quest is to destroy his overlord father, who is responsible for a crushed game console and the loss of hundreds of hours of saved game data. Being the victim of lost saved game data at the hands of others is something I can relate to, so it’s only natural I got sucked into this humorous quest full of exaggerated plot points and ludicrous characters. Honestly, while some gags work better than others, and some are just repetitive, there’s always a decent segue into each upcoming battle without becoming tiresome.

Certainly the addictive combat and endless party customization options don’t hurt, either. On top of your primary story-driven characters, you’ll have nearly 50 different character and monster classes to create from, each with their own set of skills and abilities to learn and master. Prepare your teammates in the Homeroom, a school class where clubs and titles are assigned. Position these alliances on the battlefield correctly and you can perform devastating (and visually impressive) team attacks and skill combinations. Monsters can team up with human partners using “Magichange” in which they transform themselves into powerful weapons. This is just scratching the surface of many of the tactics, strategies and abilities Disgaea 3 has to offer. After all, the level cap for your characters is 9,999.

This isn’t to say that you have to spend your gaming lifetime to fully enjoy the game. Many will be happy enough spending 20-plus hours on the main quest alone and moving on with their lives. But for the nutty completionists that thrive on a life of sub-quests and creating God-like characters, this is pure heaven. Every item in the game can reach unlocked potential in Item World, where conquering a 10-level tiered quest can create powerful equipment assets. The same system also applies to your team members in Class World where you can beef up specific stats through various missions. Considering the amount of characters and items available plus multiple endings and bonus content, there is a ridiculous amount of fun to be had here.

OVERALL (4.25/5)

As far as PlayStation Vita titles go, Disgaea 3: Absence of Detention won’t impress technically as it doesn’t fully leverage the portable’s graphical prowess or touch-screen/pad abilities. However, when it comes to classic strategic questing, this game is tops! This title offers nearly endless gameplay and nostalgic JRPG charm. If you’ve played the PS3 version up and down, there may be very little to revisit, but if you missed out or are new to the series, we highly recommend it.

Cole Hamels was slapped with a five-game suspension (which, as we’ve discussed, is a joke for starters, but we digress) for intentionally hitting phenom Bryce Harper with a pitch on Sunday. Of course, the fact that he admitted it was on purpose kind of shot any defense he would have had out the window.

Nationals starter Jordan Zimmermann, who plunked Hamels with a pitch a couple of innings later, managed to avoid a similar fate, great news for Washington, which remains in first place in the NL East.

Held to an innings count last year in his first full season back from Tommy John surgery, Zimmermann is under no such restrictions this season, and he’s tossed at least six innings in all six of his starts so far. He’s tied for 12th in NL innings hurled.

On Sunday, his command was off for the first time, as he managed just one strikeout against six walks, a shocking development considering he had a 22-3 strikeout-to-walk ratio coming into that start.

Still, Zimmermann owners must be thrilled with what they’ve seen from him so far, as he’s taken his impressive performance from last year and built on it, even if his strikeout rate is down again.

Quick Hits

• Zach McAllister looked really good in a spot start Monday, giving up just six hits and two earned runs over six innings, while fanning five and walking one. He’s headed back to Triple-A, but could be worth a look if one of the Indian starters gets hurt. McAllister, who caught our eye with his superb work at Triple-A last year, earned his first major league win for his efforts Monday. He’s been even better in the minors this season, surrendering just 30 hits over his first 35 IP and giving up just one earned run in each of his last three starts.
• Jordany Valdespin, not to be confused with Lord Voldemort, is back up with the Mets with Ruben Tejada landing on the DL. Valdespin caught our eye with his performance in the AFL in 2010 and he consolidated that with a big season last year, split between Double-A and Triple-A. He paid instant dividends for the Mets Monday, smacking a pinch-hit three-run homer off Jonathan Papelbon in the ninth inning to give the Mets a 5-2 win over Philly. Valdespin hasn’t exactly been killing it at Triple-A, but he’s going to start for the Mets Tuesday and could continue to do so all week until Ronny Cedeno returns from the DL this weekend. If you need middle infield help in an NL-only league, think about taking a flier on Lord Valdespin.
• Okay, it’s time to jump on the Jeff Samardzija bandwagon – and fast. He’s still widely available, but given his recent performance – three straight starts of one run allowed or less with 12 hits and six walks issued against 23 strikeouts in 21 1/3 IP – he won’t be on your wire for long. Samardzija’s conversion from the bullpen to the rotation has been one of the most pleasant surprises for a Cubs’ team that has sorely lacked good news through the first month. Need pitching help? Stop what you’re doing and see if Samardzija is on your wire… now!

RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast

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How ironic is it that just a few weeks after we marvelled at how Mariano Rivera has never had a serious injury in his long and illustrious career, he suffers a serious injury? While shagging flyballs. Really?!

The only closer the Yankees have known since John Wetteland was bagging saves for them in 1996 is done for the season, and considering Rivera hinted this was his final season, the immediate reaction was he done, as in rocking chair done.

But no, not to worry… Mo put those fears to rest on Friday when announcing he will be back next season.

But that still leaves us with the question about who will be earning saves in New York this season. Since Rivera’s injury, the Yanks have not had a save chance. The closest came on Friday, when David Robertson was brought in to finish up a 6-2 win, and he blew away the Royals, striking out all three batters he faced. He’s clearly going to get the first shot to do the job, but as Tim discussed in the Wire Troll on Sunday, don’t forget about Rafael Soriano.

Quick Hits

• Asdrubal Cabrera, a player we identified as one our Top 10 busts for 2012, is not cooperating with our prognostication. His two-run double Sunday helped key a huge win for Cleveland and gave him hits in five straight games and a .429 mark for the past week. Cabrera’s extra-base pop – considered somewhat of a fluke last year – has been even more impressive so far in 2012, and he’s also substantially upped his walk rate in the early going. If Cabrera can consolidate his 2011 gains, we’ll have to start considering him an upper tier shortstop real soon.
• It’s time to take a long look at R.A. Dickey – and not just in NL-only leagues, but in mixed formats as well. After tossing eight innings of four-hit, one-run ball on Sunday to earn his fourth win of the young campaign, Dickey has now tossed quality outings in 17 of his past 18 starts. Just think about that for a moment. How many starters offer that kind of consistency? His strikeout rate is higher than ever this season, and if you need pitching help (and whoever couldn’t use an extra hurler?), Dickey can help you. Go ahead… just do it.
• While we’re trolling for pitchers that could help you, how about Rick Porcello? He looked pretty good in his first two outings before taking back-to-back beatdowns. But he’s rebounded so far in May, winning his second straight start Sunday with 6 1/3 innings of four-hit, one-run ball and a season-best five strikeouts. Take away his butt ugly line against Texas on April 21 and Porcello’s numbers have been pretty good: 30 hits and 12 runs allowed in 35 2/3 IP. That computes to an ERA just a nick over 3.00, and that’s pretty useful where I come from.

RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast

Crave more in-depth Fantasy analysis? Then join us every Thursday at 9 p.m. EST for RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast on Blogtalkradio. Tim, Buck and I will entertain and edify you for an hour or more each week. Tune in here.

Another week has come and gone and the closer carousel keeps spinning. We experienced another five changes in the closer ranks last week, bringing the grand total to 13 closer swaps — prompted either by injury or ineffectiveness — since the season started. What a totally insane start to the Fantasy season. Is it possible that upwards of 50 per cent of our FAAB budgets will be spent chasing closers this season? With that in mind, let’s see if we can find some ninth inning relief for your beleaguered Fantasy bullpen.

James McDonald, SP, Pittsburgh Pirates (CBS: 28 per cent owned, ESPN: 9 per cent): McDonald continued his impressive run in 2012 by holding the Reds to one earned run Saturday in securing his second victory. In 36 2/3 IP, he’s allowed 27 hits and 13 walks, while striking out 31 and posting a 2.70 ERA and 1.09 WHIP. McDonald has been a model of consistency so far, allowing more than two earned runs only twice in his first six starts. On Monday, he racked up 10 Ks in a gem against the Braves — the majors’ top-scoring team. It’s time for doubters to give McDonald a second look in mixed formats.

Will Middlebrooks, 3B, Boston Red Sox (CBS: 45 per cent owned, ESPN: 6 per cent): Has any young hitter raised his stock more than Middlebrooks in the past year? He doubled his home run production from 2010 to 2011, whipping through Double-A and finishing the year at Triple-A Pawtucket. Middlebrooks was hitting at an absolutely torrid pace this season with nine homers in his first 93 at-bats before the BoSox recalled him with Kevin Youkilis hitting the DL with an irritated joint in his back. Just tread cautiously as the Red Sox won’t have room at the inn for Middlebrooks once Youkilis returns, but as a temporary option, the phenom looks like a nice bet.

Chris Johnson, 3B, Houston Astros (CBS: 29 per cent owned, ESPN: 10 per cent): The injuries keep mounting at the hot corner. Last week we added Youkilis and Pablo Sandoval (6-to-8 weeks with a hamate injury) to a list that already includes Evan Longoria and Ryan Zimmerman. Pedro Alvarez has already been snatched off the wire in most leagues, so Johnson moves to the top of the list of replacement options. In his last 10 games, he’s 13-for-37 with three big flies and 13 RBI. We’ve seen Johnson heat it up in the past and the batting average is not sustainable, but grab him while he’s rolling and reap the rewards.

Josh Reddick, OF, Oakland Athletics (CBS: 39 per cent owned, ESPN: 29 per cent owned): What’s up with the lack of Fantasy love for Reddick? In his past 10 games, he’s 13-for-44 with three homers, eight RBI, and a stolen base. Reddick is not flashy, but has the gig in right field in Oakland (and the clean-up slot in the lineup) and should be a steady if not spectacular performer, which makes him a solid fifth outfielder in standard leagues.

Steve Cishek, RP, Miami Marlins (CBS: 25 per cent owned, ESPN: 5 per cent): The ongoing struggles of Heath Bell finally reached the breaking point last week. The Marlins have “temporarily” removed him from his ninth inning duties, with Cishek moving into the role. This isn’t the first time we mentioned Cishek’s skill set this season, so for those that didn’t move early, the FAAB investment just got a tad higher. In 14 1/3 IP, he’s allowed seven hits and six walks, struck out 15, and compiled a miniscule 0.63 ERA. Toss in four wins (mostly thanks to Bell’s ineffectiveness) and you have the makings of a great bullpen addition.

Andrew Cashner, RP, San Diego Padres (CBS: 16 per cent owned, ESPN: 2 per cent): Huston Street landed on the DL Saturday with a strained right lat. The good news for the Padres is that it’s just a strain. In the meantime, former Cub Cashner brings his 100 mph heater and control issues (10 walks in 13 IP) to the closer role for San Diego. Street could be dealt before years’ end so this is a great opportunity to see if Cashner can in fact get the job done.

Rafael Soriano, RP, New York Yankees (CBS: 45 per cent owned, ESPN: 24 per cent): After the season-ending injury to Mariano Rivera, the rush to own David Robertson is now behind us in most Fantasy Leagues, but let’s not forget that Yankee skipper Joe Girardi has been non-committal about Mo’s replacement so far, saying only that he has two arms that he believes can get the job done. As much as Fantasy owners want Robertson and his huge strikeout potential in the closer role, you shouldn’t forget that prior to joining the Yankees, Soriano was an established closer, saving 45 games for Tampa Bay just two seasons ago.

Other Options

Ernesto Frieri, RP, Los Angeles Angels (CBS: 5 per cent owned, ESPN: 1 per cent): The Halo pen is an unmitigated disaster. Angel fans got their first look at Frieri Saturday and he didn’t disappoint, striking out the side against the Jays. Don’t be at all surprised to see Frieri move into a prominent role moving forward.

Travis Ishikawa, 1B, Milwaukee Brewers (CBS: 2 per cent owned, ESPN: unowned): Mat Gamel is out for the rest of the season with a torn ACL in his right knee. By default, Ishikawa currently owns the first base job in Beer City. The only question is how long will he keep it?

Brian Fuentes, RP, Oakland Athletics (CBS: 7 per cent owned, ESPN: 2 per cent): A’s closer Grant Balfour is struggling and Fuentes and Ryan Cook currently represent the best options in Oakland. Sad, isn’t it?

Rafael Dolis, RP, Chicago Cubs (CBS: 18 per cent owned, ESPN: 17 per cent): Carlos Marmol finally walked his way out of the Cubs’ closer gig. Dolis looks like the favourite, but his low strikeout rate isn’t something you look for in a closer. Don’t overspend, as James Russell could work his way into the mix.

Jeff Keppinger, 2B, Tampa Bay Rays (CBS: 4 per cent owned, ESPN: unowned): Keppinger is absolutely tearing up southpaws to the tune of a .476 BA.

Felipe Paulino, SP, Kansas City Royals (CBS: 10 per cent owned, ESPN: unowned): In his first start since returning from the DL with a forearm strain, Paulino shut down the Yankees on Saturday. Has he finally figured out the dimensions of home plate?

Wilin Rosario, C, Colorado Rockies (CBS: 12 per cent owned, ESPN: unowned): Rosario’s power is very real, as we saw with his two-homer performance on Saturday against the Braves.

Gordon Beckham, 2B, Chicago White Sox (CBS: 26 per cent owned, ESPN: 6 per cent): In his past five games, Beckham’s gone 8-for-17 with two homers, five RBI, and a stolen base. Memories of his great debut in 2009 still linger.

RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast

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With the season now a few weeks old, it’s time we checked in on the minor leagues to see who’s catching our eye.

A name that has to be familiar to anyone not brand spanking new to the game is Delino DeShields Jr., a second baseman (just like his pop) in the Astro organization.

Houston’s first rounder from 2010 is still over three months shy of his 20th birthday, yet he’s in his third professional season already.

DeShields Jr.’s on-base skills and stolen base prowess were immediately evident in his first taste of the Appalachian League in 2010, but he struggled to a .220 BA in his first try at full-season ball in the Sally last year.

This year, DeShields Jr. is repeating the Sally – with much better results. After going yard (a tie-breaking jack that led Lexington to the win) and scoring two runs with two steals Friday, he’s now hit safely in five straight games. DeShields Jr. is flashing a bit more gap power, but it’s all about speed with him and an 18-for-18 performance on the basepaths through 27 games speaks directly to his chief weapon.

Combine that with much better batting zone judgment this season and you can see that this youngster could be ready for a move to High-A Lancaster of the California League by mid-season.

A line-drive hitter, DeShields Jr. isn’t expected to ever hit for pop, but he’s already packed 35 pounds onto his 5’9” frame since being drafted out of high school, so perhaps he’ll develop modest power – or maybe just a not-sot-modest gut.

No, for this kid, it’s his ability to create chaos on the basepaths that will be his ticket to advancement and has him positioned to be Houston’s potential leadoff man of the future.

The jury is still out here whether DeShields Jr. will be half the player his dad was, but he definitely brings a similar skill set to the table.

Farm Seedlings

• After his crazy good 25-game debut at Triple-A last season, Adeiny Hechavarria has failed to duplicate those numbers so far this season. But that’s no real shock, because no one could have kept up that kind of pace (.389). He was so hot down the stretch that we thought the Jays might call him up when Yunel Escobar got hurt in September. Still, Hechavarria went 2-for-4 with a run and a ribbie Friday to jack his BA up to .290. He’s been sputtering a bit lately, so it was nice to see him have a solid game. The 23-year-old shortstop has scored a whopping 25 runs in 28 games, is showing nice extra-base pop, has been productive and has improved his walk rate. His offensive development buoys hopes that Hechevarria will be more than just a top-notch fielder and perhaps prompt the Jays to divest themselves of the struggling Escobar.
• Jorge Reyes, who first gained prominence with a big showing in the Cape Cod League in 2009, showed really nice progress last year at Double-A, going 10-3 with a 3.12 ERA and fine control. Despite the fact that he trended from an extreme groundball pitcher towards a more neutral ratio hurler, he wasn’t burned by the long ball. This year, however, things have been very different for the Padres’ 2009 17th rounder. In his first taste of Triple-A, Reyes is surrendering more fly balls than ground balls for the first time in his career and they are leaving the park – five times in his last three starts alone. Reyes was burned for five runs in the first two innings Thursday and although he stuck around for 5 1/3 IP, he was shelled for 11 hits and six runs in suffering his PCL-leading fifth loss in six starts. The Padres have really improved their farm system in recent years, and less than a year ago – when he was named a mid-season All-Star in the Texas League – Reyes looked like a big part of that, but the 24-year-old righty has taken a step back so far this season. If Reyes can rediscover his groundball ways, his results should improve, but until then, there’s little reason to track him.

RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast

Crave more in-depth Fantasy analysis? Then join us every Thursday at 9 p.m. EST for RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast on Blogtalkradio. Tim, Buck and I will entertain and edify you for an hour or more each week. Tune in here.

With RotoRob out of action this week, Buck and Tim were a two-man team piloting this week’s episode of RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Podcast, heard every Thursday at 9 p.m. EST.

In this week’s episode, the boys unveiled a veritable cornucopia of Fantasy baseball goodies, covering such topics as:

• Late-breaking news regarding Mariano Rivera’s fly-shagging misadventures and what this means for David Robertson’s Fantasy prospects.
• What Pablo Sandoval (or Ryan Zimmerman or Kevin Youkilis) owners should do with their dude out… is Pedro Alvarez suddenly a hot waiver wire commodity?
• The fact that Johnny Damon has been brought up by The Tribe and will soon be outfield-eligible in all leagues. Will he be an asset?
• How Josh Reddick is providing sneaky value in Oakland, providing decent across-the-board production.
• The pending return of Andy Pettitte and whether Fantasy owners should be paying attention to this development or not.
• Brandon Inge’s arrival in the Bay Area as Oakland’s latest attempt to fill the black hole that is its hot corner. Could the former Detroit golden boy be of any use to Fantasy owners?
• Whether the promotion of Will Middlebrooks from Triple-A to Beantown is a temporary measure or the beginning of the end for Youkilis.

All of this and tons of other Fantasy baseball relevant issues were tackled in this week’s Podcast. Listen to the entire show by clicking the play button below.

Dust off your cowboy hat, squeeze into your jean skirts and polish those rattlesnake-skin boots — it’s time to get honky-tonk up in this bitch! That’s right, available now for the Kinect is Country Dance All-Stars from GameMill Entertainment. Further expanding the library of dance games on the Xbox 360’s motion-control peripheral is a title with plenty of boot kicking and line-dancing without the harsh liquor or tobacco-chewing of the urban country dance hall. Well, I suppose you could add that to the home experience if you’d like, though personally I like my TV without drunken guests smashing through it and not having my fish tank double as a spittoon.

CONTROLS (3.5/5)

There are a number of dance games out for the Kinect with the same control scheme, and this one follows that successful fun formula. Each song will have players mirror the dance moves of an on-screen dance posse to the best of their abilities as they’re scored on how accurately they perform the moves. Though its aesthetic is closer to the Dance Central series, the dance gameplay is more similar to the Just Dance games. The choreography flows quickly like a real dance number, which can be overwhelming for first time players, even with the Dance Central style cue cards. They needn’t worry as the judging system isn’t very critical, making even the hardest dance numbers easy to overcome.

On one side, this makes for a great party game experience that any country music fan will easily enjoy. On the other hand, it doesn’t demonstrate the Kinect’s capabilities of recognizing body movement as impressively as other titles.  In most cases, flailing and half-assing the moves will garner the same results as putting in an earnest effort, which takes away incentive from trying harder to learn the real moves. But fun is fun, and Country Dance All-Stars is competent enough to play with the big boys in terms of control. The menu navigation is solid and the two-player modes read both dancers just fine.

GRAPHICS/SOUND (2/5)

She may be able to dance alright, but Country Dance All-Stars sure ain’t pretty. Unfortunately, all of the models and environments look like they were built from last-generation hardware and then upscaled to HD. The clothes on the dancers also have this very bizarre and distracting effect where their textures and patterns are flat and composed incorrectly. It looks like their outfits are simply chroma-keyed out with plaid patterns like a weatherman segment gone wrong.

The sound quality of the tunes is top shelf, for sure, but the tonality and style of dance for some songs just don’t match. Take Johnny Cash’s classic, “Ring of Fire,” for example. The routine for this features a set of sleeveless male dancers snake-slithering like Chippendale dancers, which doesn’t fit the tune at all. There’s a small set of slightly somber hits out of the 33-song setlist that have the same oddity, but for the most part, the mix of pop songs with classic line-dance is fitting. Outdated visuals aside, your enjoyment in the overall presentation depends solely on how much you appreciate modern country music artists such as Tim McGraw, Sugarland and Rascal Flatts.

GAMEPLAY (3/5)

There aren’t many features to speak of in this boot scootin’ boogie with its four different modes — Normal, Perfection, Freeze and Rehearsal. The Rehearsal mode is a rather weak and watered down practice session where you simply go through the routine without being scored. Since this game’s dance routines free flow as one number instead of being broken down into segments, the ability to tackle the song piece by piece in inaccessible. Perfection mode is simply the same as Normal mode except you’ll only be rewarded points for hitting “Great” moves.

That leaves Freeze as the only unique feature in Country Dance All-Stars. This mode will have randomized moments when the music will stop in which the dancer must freeze their body unless they want their score penalized for the slightest movement. This is a decent mode to give a little competitive twist to your honky-tonk shindig, but this title was built as a dancing fun-time toy with minimum functionality at best.  There are no playlist options, songs offer just one set difficulty and, as described, the modes offer little variety.

That’s not to say it doesn’t deliver what it set out to do — offer a functional dancing game with a 100 per cent country setlist. Song selection is simple enough, load times aren’t too shabby and the routines are elaborate enough to keep you moving. There’s downloadable content support for future tracks and the two-player support keeps with the times. However, the majority of the routines have way too much of a sassy feminine touch to make it a balanced experience for all players, more so than other dance titles. I was able to let loose with Dance Central 2 and Just Dance 3 very easily, but this one felt like I was trying out for a Dallas Cowgirl cheerleader position most of the time. Oh, the shame!

OVERALL (3/5)

It’s easy. You like dancing to country music? Do yourself a favour and pick up Country Dance All-Stars. It’s not impressive enough to win newcomers to the genre when compared to the big dance franchises, but on its own it’s a fun Kinect title, albeit not a good looking one. A midrange price of US$39.99 makes this 30-plus-song setlist a fair buy.

Telltale Games has carried the flag for adventure gamers, particularly on consoles. And while the company has bounced between beloved properties (Monkey Island, the upcoming King’s Quest continuation), some people were concerned with Telltale’s acquisition of popular properties. Back To The Future was received well, though Jurassic Park was problematic on many levels — so much so that many gamers were left wary of Telltale’s upcoming game based on The Walking Dead.

Fortunately, any anxieties go away as soon as you load up The Walking Dead’s first episode. It’s an emotionally gripping and smartly executed introduction into the world. Fans of both the comics and the TV show won’t be disappointed. The tale of Lee Everett works both as a prequel to the franchise (including encounters with some familiar faces) and a standalone story within the universe created by Robert Kirkman.

CONTROLS (4/5)

Telltale control schemes have gone through various iterations over recent years. For a while, games such as Sam & Max had character movement and proximity be the driver for interaction. Jurassic Park turned things into an almost completely quicktime affair. The Walking Dead brings both of these together, then tosses in an old-school point-and-click cursor for a surprisingly effective hybrid scheme. Basic movement is handled by the left analog while a semi-transparent cursor is controlled by the right analog. The cursor has top/bottom/left/right icon slots, each corresponding to a face button. When an action is available, an icon pops up in the appropriate slot.

Inventory management has disappeared, which will disappoint old school adventure gamers hoping to combing this with that in order to solve a puzzle. Instead, inventory items are contextually sensitive, appearing as a cursor icon when appropriate. This does create some simpler solutions to puzzles, but much like Heavy Rain, the game’s experience is more about how you influence the story rather than figuring out how to make your phlegm thicker for a spitting contest (blatant Monkey Island 2 reference).

Heavy Rain-esque quicktime events haven’t disappeared, though they’re used much more effectively in The Walking Dead. In some cases, the right-analog cursor becomes involved with the action, as you have to place it over the appropriate item before you hit the right button. Many of these hybrid quicktime events come with a time limit because of outside influences (like that zombie trying to eat your guts). It’s a simple control scheme, but this extra bit of movement winds up creating more tension in a stressful situation.

GRAPHICS/SOUND (4/5)

The Walking Dead’s art style is based on the comic series, so you won’t be seeing life-like characters looking like they stepped out of the AMC show. Cel-shaded models and environments keep the look and feel consistent, so much so that it’s sometimes hard to tell when cut scenes end and gameplay begins. The game’s voice actors are effective, with the leads shining brightly while some supporting characters sound like they stepped out of the local community theater.

As this isn’t an official license of the AMC TV show, you won’t hear the familiar theme song, though its rippling violin line was obviously the inspiration for the game’s theme tune. Like the show, the use of silence and low atmospheric music is done to create mood without ever being too invasive. As for the zombies, well, they sound like zombies. I’m sure there’s a stock library for all entertainment media to use for zombie sound effects at this point.

GAMEPLAY (4.5/5)

Telltale said it wasn’t heavily influenced by Heavy Rain when it made Jurassic Park, but it forgot one of Heavy Rain’s most important elements — choice and consequence. Not so with The Walking Dead. From dialog to quicktime events, your choices affect the way characters treat you (and based on previews from upcoming episodes, who will help you and who will die). Because of this, the game unfolds more like a high-production zombie Choose Your Own Adventure tale rather than a game in the truest sense. This may put off some gamers, but the story itself is engrossing. Combined with strong pacing, a fascinating world, and well-written characters, The Walking Dead can easily suck in any non-gaming friend or spouse into watching and “playing” (that is, yelling choices at the screen). There is the occasional puzzle, but most of those tend to focus on the logistics of realistically moving the story along as opposed to a puzzle for the sake of gameplay. One of these exists in the middle of the game, and it will probably live in adventure game infamy similar to the Gabriel Knight cat hair puzzle in terms of character stupidity.

Most of your choices come out during dialog with other characters, and many of these come with a timer beneath the dialog options. Whether you support someone, insult them, or act indifferent, a note will flash on the screen telling you how the specific character reacted. While these don’t provide many life-altering consequences — it mostly changes the tone on how people talk to you — the seeds are planted for future ripple effects. There is, however, one significant choice at the end of Episode One, and based on the weight of this choice, it seems fair that Telltale feels no one is safe in this world.

I haven’t said too much about the story, and that’s mostly because story comprises most of the game’s experience. It’s best to walk into it as cold as possible so you’re not swayed in one direction or the other. However, because of your choice’s ripple effects, there is a good level of replayability. This will probably become even more evident when future episodes roll out and you think, “Oh crap, I should have saved the other person” but as we learned with Heavy Rain, interactive fiction is all about the journey, not the result.

OVERALL (4.5/5)

From a technical perspective, each element of The Walking Dead falls under Very Good, not Great territory. When tied together with fascinating characters and a immersive world, it becomes something special. Anyone looking for a zombie action game a la Dead Rising or Left 4 Dead will be disappointed. However, if you’re a fan of the franchise (in either form), like adventure games, or enjoyed Heavy Rain, The Walking Dead is a grand experience and one of the best things Telltale has ever done.

When I was growing up, LEGO was always one of my favourite toys. I loved building ships, destroying them and then building completely different ones. In fact, as I type this, somewhere in my parents’ garage is a plastic trashcan filled with those colourful bricks. As an adult I’ve still gleaned enjoyment from the LEGO video games — specifically the Star Wars series — and was looking forward to seeing LEGO Harry Potter Years 5-7 on my PlayStation Vita. So, without further ado, Expecto Reviewum!

CONTROLS (4.5/5)

With only a few commands to keep track of here there are actually several redundancies found on the Vita’s setup. Specifically there are three different ways to cycle through your selection of spells: the right analog stick, the left and right bumpers or by touching the spell wheel with your finger. Casting is done with the square; up to three targets can be painted, or you can hold down the button and lock-on with a more powerful version of your spell. You can also jump (X), switch between characters (triangle) and interact with the environment (O).

A handful of touch screen functions are also on offer. Beyond spell toggling you can tap the screen to interact with objects and switch wizards, and there are also times when a hint icon will appear that you can press for more information. The rear touch pad can be used in conjunction with the square button to move the targeting reticle when casting spells. Everything works efficiently, and outside of an inability to manipulate the camera there’s nothing to complain about here.

GRAPHICS/SOUND (3.75/5)

Few films have been more visually impressive over the past decade-plus than the Harry Potter franchise, and seeing the LEGO equivalent on the Vita is really a lot of fun. Everything is bright and vibrant, and even the darker scenes from the movies have been cheered up for young audiences. The cut scenes do tend to be a little murky looking, though, which doesn’t fit with the rest of the package. Still, the actual gameplay sections are undeniably charming.

All the signature Harry Potter tunes are represented here and help keep the spirit of the film series front and centre. As with all LEGO games (or at least the ones I’ve played) there are no spoken lines as all dialogue is replaced by grunts and other unintelligible noises. It’s a cute gimmick.

GAMEPLAY (3.5/5)

As with the movies, Years 5-7 are spaced out over four installments with The Deathly Hallows being split into two parts. Hogwarts doubles as a central hub that allows you to access them and a handful of other activities, such as a dueling club, though they need to be cleared in order before you have free reign to jump around as you please.

Levels are split into chapters, nearly all of which follow the same basic formula of destroying objects to accumulate studs and manipulating LEGOs until you’ve solved enough silly puzzles to advance. Clearly this is a game primarily aimed at children, and as such the difficulty level is nearly non-existent. Enemy encounters are few and far between, and outside of the occasional awkward platforming moment, it’s pretty difficult to actually lose a life.

Should you burst into bits you’ll immediately respawn ad infinitum; once again a concession to the age of many that will be playing. Despite that, LEGO Harry Potter Years 5-7 is still a fun game for adults as well. Beyond just the charm of the LEGO world, the leisurely pace and constant nods to the source material (both films and books) make it a nice low-intensity option — especially on a handheld system like the Vita where abbreviated gaming sessions are common.

Like past LEGO games, every level in Years 5-7 is designed to be revisited multiple times as you unlock new characters that grant entry into previously inaccessible areas. That is just part of the staggering amount of content packed into the game as clearing all four story modes will still leave you hovering around 50 per cent completion. Some of that extra content can be purchased with the studs you’ll be collecting along the way while other stuff must be found in the levels themselves.

There is one significant omission from the console versions, however, as co-operative play has been jettisoned. As anyone who has played any of the half-dozen or so LEGO video games knows, co-op is one of the franchise’s true bright spots. It’s still a fun game without it, though the absence is felt.

OVERALL (3.5/5)

LEGO Harry Potter Years 5-7 pretty much holds your hand from beginning to end with spoon-fed puzzle solutions and one-button combat, yet it’s hard not to have a good time, whether you’re facing off with Voldemort in the Ministry of Magic or raiding Gringott’s. The lack of multiplayer is a blow, but this is solid casual fare nonetheless.

Coming off the release of the ultraviolent Bloodforge, Xbox Live’s Arcade NEXT promotion gets a much more family-friendly offering this week with Lionhead Studios’ Fable Heroes. There’s still a hack ‘n’ slash motif, but demons being hewn in two has been replaced by Hobbes in Santa hats bursting into coins. It’s typical Fable silliness dressed up in a new package; but is the series’ transition from action RPG to side-scrolling beat ‘em up a successful one?

CONTROLS (3.75/5)

While the main Fable games split melee, ranged and magic attacks across three face buttons, Heroes streamlines this even further with light and flourish (read: heavy) attacks only. A dodge function allows you to evade your foes and pulling the right trigger unleashes an area attack that damages all enemies around you at the expense of your own health.

This setup is undeniably easy, though the inability to dictate your attack type is disappointing. It’s a non-issue for characters that have only ranged or melee strikes, but for someone like Jack of Blades, who uses both, it’s left entirely to the computer’s discretion. That lack of control also removes any semblance of strategy and leaves Fable Heroes as little more than a button masher.

GRAPHICS/SOUND (3.5/5)

Those that remember hero dolls from the first two Fable games will recognize them as the genesis for this game’s look. The puppets flop about as they traverse the map before assuming more “lifelike” movements during gameplay. In action the puppets move smoothly, swinging their swords and casting spells against waves of enemies. To the game’s credit, the frame rate almost never stutters no matter how many coins, monsters and visual effects fill the screen.

Of course, that also speaks to Fable Heroes’ most notable visual black eye: it’s too busy. The game delights in unleashing dozens of foes at once, and after you’ve killed the first wave, the screen is often littered with coins as a second group materializes. Add each character’s signature attack effect (such as little skulls appearing as they swing their weapon) and it’s very easy to lose track of your character and fall into a pattern of “I know I’m in there somewhere so I better hit ‘X’ and attack!”

The game’s soundtrack can be described in two words: relentlessly upbeat. No matter what’s going on the music happily marches along, providing a constant reminder that this is supposed to fun and whimsical. It’s a little much after awhile — I played with the volume low most of the time — but I suspect kids will enjoy it.

GAMEPLAY (3.5/5)

Fable Heroes brings together several of the series’ well-known characters in puppet form for an old-fashioned beat ‘em up. Initially you’ll have access to four heroes with the ability to unlock another six (with two more apparently arriving when Fable: The Journey releases). It’s a decent selection, even if they overlap in terms of how they function in battle.

Seven levels comprise the world of Albion, each of which contains a branching path. One road leads to a boss fight while the other takes you to a mini game. Once completed you can choose to replay any level or go directly to the boss battle or mini game. After you’ve finished all seven, Dark Albion becomes available. Here things are visually remixed with harder enemies, though you’re unlikely to be tested much even on the highest difficulty setting.

Combat is of the button mash variety. As noted, the graphical insanity often makes it hard to do much more than press “X” and hope for the best. Play long enough and you’ll become accustomed to the chaos and do some different things, but it never opens up with any real variety. Even the power-up chests that provide temporary attributes like speed or increased size become little more than nuisances once your character gets strong enough.

Where Fable Heroes succeeds is by making each level simultaneously co-operative and competitive. You and your teammates (human or A.I. — you’re always in a team of four) are working together to dispatch foes while still trying to collect as many coins as possible. Do too much killing and others will reap the rewards. Don’t do enough and your multiplier will suffer, meaning you won’t earn as much currency.

Once you cross the finish line all the coins will be tallied and an Olympic-style podium will appear with the top three finishers being honoured. The last-place hero sits alone and is highlighted with a “wa, wa, waaaaaa” to cement their status as the loser. Each level contains a meter with multiple thresholds that are filled by the coins, and at each threshold you earn a die. The more coins you pocket the more dice you’ll be able to roll on the abilities board.

The abilities board doubles as Fable Heroes’ upgrade system, only instead of being able to upgrade what and when you want you’ll need to land on the square containing the upgrade, which you then pay for with gold. The outer board contains 20 squares with almost 40 abilities ranging from additional damage and better weapons to changing facial expressions and kicking Hobblettes. If nothing else, it forces you to play longer to net all the upgrades.

After you purchase all the abilities, your puppet will move to the inner board, which contains tiles that appear as you earn the game’s achievements. There are 12 in all, and these provide single-use boosts for your next level — such as doing more damage or having coins gravitate toward you. The hope is that after playing through all 14 levels (there are actually 16 levels, but “The Cloud” is a community unlock that is unavailable at this time) you’ll want to go back and destroy your previous high score.

Without that desire, however, Fable Heroes is an incredibly short game that can be completed in less than 90 minutes. There’s also the matter of repetition. We’ve already mentioned that the combat is barebones, but on top of that the mini games are primarily button-mash races with a survival arena and some chicken shenanigans tossed in. To enjoy the game you’ve got to embrace that approach.

Online play is also a mixed bag. In terms of performance it holds up well, but unless you’re the host you’re powerless. They select where you go, if you can change puppets, when to leave the post-level wrap screen and more. I finished the final level with someone that must have wandered off, leaving me to watch the credits on loop until I dashboard quit. Not cool. Also, I lost all sense of impact online. This is PG stuff at the darkest of moments, but it just seemed like I was swinging my sword through air and then enemies would eventually burst into coins.

OVERALL (3.5/5)

For better or worse, there’s not a whole lot of steak relative to Fable Heroes’ sizzle. The combat is mindless, the challenge is minimal and the replay value is grounded in a willingness to do the same things repeatedly to better your score. If you enjoy that formula it’s a worthy purchase. If not, don’t bother.

By Tim McLeod and RotoRob

Tim is away this weekend (but not to worry — he left me detailed instructions), so the Wire Troll falls to your trusty editor this week. And what a week it’s been, especially this weekend as we saw some serious highly-touted talent get the call to the Show. On to this week’s Fantasy baseball waiver wire picks…

Mike Trout, OF, Los Angeles Angels: The Angels – off to a crappy start – decided to shake things up, releasing Bobby Abreu and bringing up top prospect Trout. You can bet they didn’t recall him to collect splinters and with Peter Bourjos off to a lousy start and Vernon Wells not exactly tearing it up, Trout is going to get some burn. The kid was making a mockery of Triple-A, batting over .400 with 21 runs (in 20 games!), one dinger, five triples and six swipes. No. 3 on the RotoRob Top 55 Prospects list this season, Trout has also shown an improved batting eye (11 walks, 16 strikeouts). This 20-year-old uber talent is clearly much more prepared for the bigs than he was last year when he struggled in a 40-game stint.
 
Bryce Harper, OF, Washington Nationals: Harper — one of the two players ahead of Trout on our Top 55 Prospects list (No. 1, in fact) — was also recalled this weekend. There’s definitely some question about whether he’s ready for this, and it’s also reasonable to wonder whether this is a short-term stint while Ryan Zimmerman is on the DL, or if Harper is here for good. He was only hitting .250 through 20 games at Triple-A with very little extra-base pop, so it will be interesting to see how he fares in his first taste of the bigs. Harper came through with his first big league hit on Saturday in LA and even Dodger fans were excited; in fact, one was so stoked he felt it necessary to show his ass to the world. Harper may one day be a star, but on Saturday the only visible heavenly body was Uranus.

Tony Campana, OF, Chicago Cubs: Heading into the season, we had Campana ranked as a top 125 outfielder, but even though he started the year in the minors, he’s already been vastly better than that, currently performing at a top 75 level. He’s a real offensive instigator, specializing in distracting opponent hurlers, and in the week and half since being promoted from Triple-A, Campana is carving out a role for himself on the offensively-challenged Cubs, swiping five bases in four games before Saturday. He’s combining with Starlin Castro to give Chicago a much-needed spark near the top of the lineup. Extra-base pop is not his thang, but Campana is playing well enough that it’s hard to imagine he’s not going to stick and the fact that he moved up to the two-hole last week is another promising sign.
 
Scott Downs, RP, Los Angeles Angels: We did mention the Angels are shaking things up, right? A top 70 reliever in our pre-season relief pitcher rankings, Downs has actually underperformed slightly so far, but that could all change now that he’s replaced Jordan Walden, who’s been “temporarily” removed as the Angel closer. After all the drama that Walden brings to the table, how soothing was it for LA to see Downs toss a 1-2-3 ninth Saturday to bag his first save? No one knows how temporary this gig is for Downs, but one thing we all know is that this dude is hard to hit. Who cares that as a soft-tossing lefty he doesn’t fit the closer profile? Downs gets people out and that’s what you need in the role.

Pedro Strop, RP, Baltimore Orioles: With Jim Johnson suffering from the flu, Strop has stepped in and temporarily grabbed the O’s closing gig, vaulting past Kevin Gregg and Matt Lindstrom in Baltimore’s bullpen. Acquired from the Rangers last summer for Mike Gonzalez, Strop has pretty much come out of nowhere to earn two holds, two wins and two saves (back-to-back) in his last six outings. He’s improved his control and his ratio has been phenomenal even if his ERA is up slightly. Strop should retain value even when Johnson returns and has now arrived as the official closer of the future in B-More.

Addison Reed, RP, Chicago White Sox: To the surprise of many, Hector Santiago grabbed the closer role for the Sox, but he’s blown two of his last three saves chances. And despite Robin Ventura standing behind him (and sort of staking his managerial reputation on this choice), the leash has to be getting shorter here. Jesse Crain has landed on the DL, so the replacement options come down to Matt Thornton or Reed. Reed is the most skilled reliever the White Sox have, and he has a real chance to be earning saves this season – sooner if not later. Smart owners have already been adding Addison and while he’s not striking out batters at the same rate as last year, he’s not being touched on the scoreboard – and we mean at all. Chicago’s bullpen is very young, giving Reed a chance to establish himself as a long-term closer very soon.

Other Options

Brandon Belt, OF/1B San Francisco Giants: Aubrey Huff’s anxiety issues have given Belt a chance to prove he belongs in an MLB lineup every day.

Michael Saunders, OF, Seattle Mariners: Saunders smoked two dingers Friday, including a grand salami, further entrenching himself as the every CFer — at least until Franklin Gutierrez comes back in June.

Mitchell Boggs, RP, St. Louis Cardinals: Boggs’ great start has seen him ascend to the primary set-up role and with Jason Motte struggling, he’s just an injury (or a complete implosion by Motte) away from having serious value.

Nick Hundley, C, San Diego Padres: Hundley started slowly, but is starting to roll and has spent most of his time hitting in prime RBI slots in the Padre lineup, so if he’s still on your wire, grab him while you can.

Jason Hammel, SP, Baltimore Orioles: Hammel has looked phenomenal so far and is even striking out hitters this season. WTF? Grab him while you can while he’s flying off the wire.

RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast

Crave more in-depth Fantasy analysis? Then join us every Thursday at 9 p.m. EST for RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast on Blogtalkradio. Tim, Buck and I will entertain and edify you for an hour or more each week. Tune in here.

Ripped from another era of gaming, developer Polytron brings you Fez, a game available for your purchasing pleasure on Xbox Live Arcade. Now go buy this game. Yes, I’m serious; you’ve spent enough time not playing this game, go buy it right now. If you really want to wait, go ahead and keep reading, but just remember one thing — Fez is waiting for you.

CONTROLS (5/5)

At its heart, Fez is a puzzle platformer, so things like slick controls and tight responsiveness are must haves. Jumping and movement are pretty standard, oriented to the left analog stick and “A” button. The other face buttons control world interactions, such as picking up and throwing objects or talking to NPCs, and accessing your inventory. Pressing back brings up the world map, which helps keep you from getting lost in Fez’s large and interconnected world.

The real crazy stuff happens when you use the bumpers or triggers to spin the world 90 degrees in the direction of your button press. Even in the midst of tricky gameplay, Fez seamlessly delivers its controls in a way that feels familiar even if you’ve never played it before.

GRAPHICS/SOUND (5/5)

Visually, this game is an 8-bit masterpiece. Upon exiting Gomez’s house at the start, you’re instantly greeted by a scenic 360-degree pan of the town, showing off every intricate detail. The game is just as fun to watch as it is to play, and it never hurts to stop for a moment and soak in the beautiful design of each area. The 3D panning effect works in conjunction with the visuals to make exploration immersive as you not only want to explore to progress to the next challenge, you want to see everything this beautiful world has to offer. From a cloud floating lazily in the sky to a crashing waterfall, Fez delivers images that will keep you coming back.

Expect that same level of excellence from the soundtrack, which delivers some of the most complimentary backings to a game’s visuals I’ve ever experienced. At times the music is haunting, mixing a beauty and darkness seldom heard in games, and at others its uplifting tone and curious nature inspire the adventure even more. It pushes you gently along, urging you to explore with its expansive tones and mystifying overtures.

When you start your journey through Fez’s world you may find it easy to start picking favourites. You’ll soon discover, however, that picking a favourite is a fruitless endeavour — every song delivered from the title screen to the credits is just amazing. Offering charm, spirit and an undeniable sense of adventure, Fez’s soundtrack is one of Xbox Live Arcade’s best.

GAMEPLAY (4.75/5)

Gomez’s world isn’t like yours or mine. His world is one dimensional, much like in classic games such as Metroid or Castlevania. Gomez’s journey begins like any other platformer, but shortly into the game he is given a fez; and everything changes. This fez has the ability to spin his world horizontally in each direction. His world, however, still exists within the pre-given confines of its one dimensionality — this means that distance is irrelevant and if it’s touching it exists in the same plane and therefore can be traversed. Opening your mind to this way of thinking takes a little while to get used to, but soon you’ll realize how much of a step forward in puzzle games it is. The linearity of Gomez’s world no longer takes the form of a crutch to gameplay, instead literally shaping itself into a powerful tool at your disposal.

Fez’S vast world is begging to be explored. Through every doorway and passage unique environments await your platforming prowess, each with different challenges and obstacles to overcome. Each challenge you face requires a different approach, and paying attention to the environment is key to solving many of the game’s more challenging puzzles and riddles.

It’s actually quite easy to become lost in all the madness, making the in-game map a necessity. With tons of collectables to acquire, puzzle platformer isn’t a suitable description for this title; rather it takes the shape of said genre, offering mind- bending puzzles with lengthy, platform-based exploration. Dying in Fez is something that may happen quite frequently. Upon dying you’re immediately returned to the last place your feet were firmly planted on the ground. In most cases, dying offers information on how not to tackle an obstacle, which is more useful than you might think. The amount of time you’ll spend with Fez depends heavily upon your willingness to explore its world and learn its secrets — and however much time that turns out to be is time well spent.

Sadly, Fez is not a flawless diamond as one small issue stopped me from giving it the perfect status it nearly attained — the auto-save feature. Now don’t get me wrong, it works great and keeps you from worrying about lost progress by saving every time you enter a doorway or get a collectable. During the saving process however, the game sometimes experiences a brief patch of lag, which is enough to wreck any jump you are currently doing when it occurs. After you know it happens it’s an easy fix to just wait for the auto save before progressing, but every now and then the thrill of exploration will get to you, and a quick drop will be your demise.

OVERALL (4.75/5)

This game is overwhelmingly amazing. It gives off a shine of light that reaches into the farthest depths of your being to remind you of what a game should aspire to be. Fez is a gaming experience that should absolutely not be missed.

This week’s episode of RotoRob’s Fantasy Baseball Weekly Podcast (heard every Thursday at 9 p.m. on Blogtalkradio) featured an under-the-wire arrival by RotoRob and some technical issues by either just him or everyone, depending on who you were listening to. Buck, Tim and I muddled through, offering up over an hour and a half’s (!) worth of Fantasy baseball analysis covering the top issues of the week, including:

• Carl Crawford’s injury woes have travelled from his wrist down to his elbow, and now he’s going to miss another three months as a result. WTF?
• Still in the AL East, the Yankees are having problems of their own with one of their prized acquisitions as Michael Pineda needs shoulder surgery that will cost him the entire season.
• On the west coast, meanwhile, Aubrey Huff is being haunted by anxiety issues that have landed him on the DL. Is this finally Brandon Belt’s time to shine?
• Another NL West squad is dealing with a different type of health woe as the Padres’ rotation took another serious hit when it was announced Dustin Moseley would require season-ending surgery.
• Uh oh. Ryan Zimmerman’s injury issues have cropped up again as he’s been out since Saturday with a shoulder woe. What’s the prognosis here? And how good have the Nats been despite all these injuries?
• Moving to the midwest, the Royals bullpen took a hit this week when Greg Holland suffered a rib injury. Many thought that by now he’d be the man to own in the KC pen, but he’s been anything but so far. How do things look for that relief corps now?

We covered all of these issues, plus many, many, many more in this extremely in-depth Podcast. Listen to the show in its entirety by clicking that cool little pointy thing below.

After a winter of inactivity following the 2010, the Reds raised a lot of eyebrows this winter by being among the most active clubs – dealing away a good chunk of their prospect cadre, penning a few big free agents and locking up franchise player Joey Votto to a 10-year, $225-million deal.

The deal gave Votto his wish – to be the highest-paid Canadian-born player. But Cincinnati didn’t have to go that crazy to fulfill his dream. The previous record deal for a Canadian player was Larry Walker’s six-year, $70-million contract. Now Votto is signed through age 39 in yet another example of a deal that may not look as good as the player ages. Time will tell, but we believe the Reds do understand that this contract can come back to haunt them six or seven years from now. Let’s not forget that Votto dealt with anxiety issues a couple of years ago, something Aubrey Huff understands all too well right now. We’re not saying it will be an issue for Votto again, but it’s not out of the question, either.

For now, the Reds have a long-term solution at first base, a move cemented when the club dealt away Yonder Alonso.

Still, regardless of Votto’s MVP-calibre play, signing a first baseman to that long a deal and giving him that much money seems unwise to us.

Meanwhile, the now incredibly rich Votto is off to a sluggish start. He went 1-for-3 with an RBI double and a walk Wednesday, but hasn’t gone yard since the second game of the season. One homer in 18 games? Well, Albert Pujols — who knows a thing or two about crazy long, massively expensive contracts for first basemen — would kill for numbers like that.

Votto does lead the NL in walks, and with a .444 OBP, he’s on pace for his finest season in that regard. But let’s face it: he’s not getting paid the big bucks to draw walks. The Reds need dingers, RBI and BA from Votto, and through 18 games, his 1-10-.279 mark is not inspiring. He’s also failed to swipe a base yet and striking out more often than ever before.

Quick Hits

• Kila Ka’aihue, who has pretty much become a forgotten man, is off to a very nice start for the A’s and he played the hero Wednesday night with a game-winning single in the 14th inning. While the Kila Monster has failed to go yard yet this season, he’s been doing a good job of getting on base while splitting time at first base and DH. Daric Barton continues to underwhelm us at first base, so don’t completely write off Ka’aihue’s chances of becoming a useful asset in deeper AL-only leagues. For now, watch how things play out.
• Troy Tulowitzki’s modest five-game hit streak ended in the second game of the doubleheader Wednesday, but his single in the seventh inning of the opener busted up James McDonald’s no-hitter. Tulowitzki, of course, sat atop our pre-season shortstop rankings, but he’s barely performed like a top 10 shortstop through the first few weeks of the season. He’s already been sat once to try to shake him out of his slump, and his strikeout rate is up slightly – although hardly at an alarming level. Looking for a buy-low candidate? Tulowitzki could be a fine choice if his current owner is getting a tad frustrated.
• Ben Zobrist snapped an 0-for-17 skid with a home run Wednesday to help the Rays rack up their fourth straight win and improve to 6-1 over the past seven games. After scoring 99 runs last year, Zobrist has just 10 through 18 games, and it’s surprising he even has that many considering his .180 BA. A groundball hitter as a rookie, Zobrist quickly became a perennial flyball hitter, but over the past three seasons, he’s morphing more into a neutral hitter in that regard. It will be interesting to see if that affects his home run total; he’s now smacked three already, which puts him on pace to match his career high, but his current ratio of one home run out of every four fly balls is way unsustainable. Assuming his flyball rate doesn’t increase, keep a close eye on Zobrist’s home run rate over the next few weeks.